Approbation

Would it surprise you if I told you that I write on this blog solely in order to receive the approbation of my readers?  Would it surprise you if I told you that one kind comment could fuel several future posts here, a general feeling of well-being, and a belief that maybe I can actually be a successful writer?

Even if that is not wholly true, it is a little too near the truth for comfort's sake.

I mentioned in conversation the other day how much we artists seem to need that approval.  The response I received was that this fact does not apply only to artists.  Certainly that is true, for it is after all a very human trait.  Perhaps the difference for artists lies elsewhere: it is not that artists need approbation from others more than other humans, but that we are more willing to admit that we need it.  We can excuse that need as a natural consequence of creating for others.  It thereby sounds somehow less selfish and therefore more publicly acceptable.  There again we hide behind the mask of truth.

As I began to ponder that need for praise and recognition, I took up my directing book to read another chapter.  (The book, for those who are curious, is A Sense of Directing: Some Observations on the Art of Directing, by William Ball.)  There I found the idea of needing recognition, as applies specifically to actors, accentuated in quite strong language:

"Each actor who enters the profession carries with him from childhood a starvation for approbation.  As he grows older, he finds that acting is a socially acceptable form of doing something in hope of getting the kind of approval that he missed in his childhood.  A director understands that to an actor praise is like food.  The actor cannot live without it, cannot flourish without it."

It would be nice to pretend that the need for attention from others was somehow restricted to actors, or even to artists, as somehow that makes it less personal—because it is about the profession and not the person.  Yet if we are strictly honest with ourselves, we know that is a lie.  Our need arises from a deep reality of human nature: from the fact that we are not individuals, that we cannot truthfully sing out, "I am a rock, I am an island," but must rather recognize that we need others.  We are made for community.

I would extrapolate further that we find our need for approbation from others to be greatest where we find the least community.  When we live in a society broken apart from the root of true community life, we must seek ever harder to fill the hole left behind.  We connive our way into getting "likes" on Facebook, take "selfies" to show off our good looks, collect friends we have never met, haunt online forums where we can pretend to be experts on whatever topic we choose, produce clever 140 character tweets, and so on.  All of these things create a physical response as the brain produces dopamine, telling us that this is pleasurable.  They do not require much risk, but neither does the fruit last.  Only a few seconds or minutes later, we need another dopamine response, and another and another and another....

The alternative?  Someone brought to my attention that a good portion of land in Todi, Italy, was up for sale for a fairly reasonable price.  We could go and found a community there, live it out with all of its challenging and gritty details, and see which brings lasting peace.  Any takers?